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UNDERCOVER COPS
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Quite a bizarre beat 'em up which is unfortunately saddled with the most boring, generic name possible. It's not even about undercover cops, since they walk around in broad daylight throwing fireballs at robots and mole people.
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SHIFTY CRIMS
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Thugs you fight on every level. Maybe you're tracking them down because they stole the costumes from Waterworld.
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MOLE MEN! This is more like it! Just when you think it can't get any better, they send waves of attack moles after you. And when you think that can't get any better, they send robot attack moles.
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Stupidly difficult flying guys with bombs strapped to their backs and scissors for hands.
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Cliched female thugs who hop for some reason.
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Bikers in day-glo pink uniforms seem pretty tame by comparison. Sorry, guys.
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NOT QUITE THE BEST BOSS EVER
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The king of the mole people, I think. His arms turn into machine guns and he says "Sayonara" when he burrows away.
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Some sort of clown with a turd on his head. He turns into a skeleton when he dies.
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The boss of the first level seems like an Abobo ripoff until his skin melts off and he turns into a robot. You can either beat him normally, or force him into a trash compactor and squash him. Nice.
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Doctor Crayborn, who I assume was behind everything since I can't read Japanese. Seems boring, but then he mutates into a giant monster that can extend its neck like an accordian and fire lightning from its back.
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THE BEST BOSS EVER
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Oh God, where do I start? She's morbidly obese, wearing nothing but her underwear, and armed with a fucking jackhammer. Not only does she hit you with said jackhammer, but she pounds the ground with it until motorcycles fall out of the sky. Ah, but the best is yet to come! When you get her down to 1/2 health, she starts crying. Her behaviour doesn't change, but she has tears coming out of her eyes and is constantly making this horrible whining noise. I love her to death.
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